Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Wrecking Ball Dreams

Tap, tap, tap...


Knock, knock, knock...


Higher Self: Hello?? Is anyone in there?

Lower Self (er, me): Oh. You talkin' to me?

Higher Self: Uh, actually, yes. I've been trying to get your attention.

Me: Wow. How long have you been standing there knocking?

Higher Self: A while.

Me: Sorry. I've been a little busy.

Higher Self: Yeah, apparently you didn't get my message the other night either.

Me: Message? Uh, no, I--

Higher Self: In the dream, the dream! You know the one where you were in the roomful of babies?

Me: Babies? Well, maybe there were babies. Hey, you're not suggesting--

Higher Self: No, no, nothing like that. You're being literal.

Me: Oh.

Higher Self: So you remember, in the dream, how your boss kissed your forehead, smiled benevolently and said, "You should do that." (indicating the babies)

Me: (Eyeing Self-Righteous Higher Self suspiciously) I should become a nanny?

Higher Self: Try to focus.

Me: Okay. I'm focused. Like a laser beam. Just spit it out, will you?

Higher Self: The babies. They're not...babies. They're ideas. The birth of something creative. You remember creative...right?

Me: Creative.... Uh, huh.... Those 'babies' don't come cheap, you know? And like I said, I'm a little busy right now.

Higher Self: Hey, I'm not concerned with minutae that blocks your path.

Me: Path, schmath... I'm getting a regular paycheck. I don't have time for "babies." (grandson excluded)

Higher Self: (Smiling pitiably at it's lower common denominator.) If the knocking's not loud enough, I can arrange for a wrecking ball...

Me: Is this all about that finished novel manuscript I'm not submitting? Because I'm not scared if that's what you think. I'm not. Of rejection.And ego battering "this was really close for me" letters, or reminders about how hard the publishing biz is these days. And when I say'finished' that's merely a figurative statement. It needs a 5,365th rewrite.

Higher Self: Two words: Minutae, excuses. That's all I have to say.

Me: Well, thank God you're done. I'm sure all the people out there reading this are glad, too.

Higher Self: I'm gonna keep sending the baby dreams.

Me: I know.


Bonnie Zieman, M.Ed. said...

Fabulous post Barbara! Our higher selves are so persistent, and so darn right. Our creative works are our babies like you say ... and, therefore, our responsibility to develop and launch. I say that as I look as paintings piled against the wall that I am not even trying to get into a gallery.
Guess I'm scared someone will say, "Sorry lady, that's one hell of an ugly baby."

Hope you are well and having a good prelude to Christmas.

Matty said...

This is a nice reminder to trudge along with my business idea I've put on hold. For any number of reasons.

Hope your babies take you where you want to go.

Happy Holidays.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Ha ha, clearly you know the Higher Self's operating methods!

Sarah Sullivan said...

Yes...Barb my must tend to do this too me also!! Well I see you figured out the babies.
I will just say this..if you can write something like this off the top of your head and make me giggle and snort..over just this do need to go feed those babies!! I have read your work for years are a funny girl you are also anamazing writer. I have told you before..but will again...your character development is the best out is..I love the way you draw the reader in. Believe me..if I can read a sex scene by you and forget it is you got it pegged do!!
So whatever I can do to help with the just call me and I'm there!! Love you Sis, Sarah

Giggle..the word verification is "mynapper".

Sarah Sullivan said...

Ooop my muse....

rxBambi said...

great post. I love that the babies in your dream are ideas. Now you have me thinking what my dreams mean. Nothing I'm sure...
Just do it. You'll never know until you try, right? Yep, I'm a walking cliche, I know. :)

Snap said...

Fabulous post. Those babies begin to have babies who have babies who ... well you get the drift ... they stack up and up ... get with it! :D :D :D

David said...

Listen to your muse! You're a writer. And I love your latest manuscript. Share it...

clairedulalune said...

I can so relate to your post, my higher self is clubbing me over the head right now. You can do it, we both can! You first of course. ((Hugs))

Chatty Crone said...

Just so you know it did post - I'm glad I was wondering where you were. I know this season is busy though.

So your husband did a series with Robert Urich. I always liked him and thought he seemed like such a great person. His son acted in one show too - in a wheelchair - forgot the name of the show.

Anyway I think he worked untilt he end and died with great dignity.

Waiting for you next blog and thanks for the kind things you said about mine - I feel the same about yours.