Saturday, December 19, 2009

Be Kind To Yourself

Do you make resolutions? New Years or otherwise? How do you feel about them? Do you find yourself let down at the end of the year when you don't achieve your goals? Or does your list make you work harder to accomplish things? Do goals set your direction for the next year or do you drift along waiting for fate to find you?

I'm a believer in goals. But I've never been a writer of  lists-- mostly because I inevitably lose them, and then I feel like an idiot for doing it. I keep my lists in my head. (Although, I confess, that is a less and less efficient system considering C.R.S has set in. (Can't Remember, uh, Stuff.) Or maybe it's system overload. "The hard drive is temporarily inaccessible." Whatever the reason, lists are starting to be more appealing. And according to Oprah and the other 'experts' out there,  the very act of writing a goal down imprints it into your psyche or shoots the request out into the Universe to be fulfilled by the Wish Gremlins and... yeah, never mind...

Maybe it's too early to begin thinking about  goals for next year, but today, it occurred to me that (thankfully!) 2009 is wrapping up.  And just as I began to feel depressed about the time wasted this year, the things left undone,  I began looking back over the year I realized that I actually accomplished a lot this year.  I:
  •  graduated from Grad School
  • rewrote my screenplay 4,391 times. (okay I may be exaggerating that a bit. It just feels like that.)
  • published another book
  • welcomed a grandson into the world (while that was a deam of mine, my darling daughter did all the work on that one...)
  • learned to Skype.
  • survived the horrid economy (Yeah,...that would be me on the right.  Should've seen that one coming...)
  • got a full time (office) job for the first time in 30 years.
  • and have managed to survive 3 months of crazy law office stress.
  • realized that everything (including this job) comes for a reason and I'm learning a lot.
       I guess we all tend to be hard on ourselves this time of year when things haven't gone as planned. But making this list of accomplishments made me feel better than looking at the things I'd left undone. And it gave me a starting point for my next year's list.

Oh, there will be things on that one, too, that will go undone. But next year, I'm gonna write another list of the great things that happened and not beat myself up too much for the other stuff. 

Hope you all have a wonderful, blessed Holiday, however you celebrate it,  and I wish you all bright 2010 with lists of dreams realized.


Matty said...

I like how you created an after-the-fact list. The things you accomplished instead of what you wanted to accomplish. Looks like your 2009 was busy and worthwhile. Congratulations.

I don't do resolutions. I just have a short list in my head. What I get done gets done. It's called crusin'.

Barbara said...

Thank you! And I'm with you on the resolutions. Somehow that word carries baggage with it. And honestly, I've got enough of that!! Happy Holidays!

stregata said...

It is great to focus on what we want to achieve. But it is important to acknowledge what we have achieved.
I wish you a peaceful and wonderful Christmas and a New Year full of possibilities, love and abundance!

Debra She Who Seeks said...

That's a great list of accomplishments for 2009! You're right -- dwell on the positive, not the negative!

Snap said...

"Hope you all have a wonderful, blessed Holiday, however you celebrate it, and I wish you all bright 2010 with lists of dreams realized."

Thank you, and right back at you!

Chatty Crone said...

You have the best sense of humor!

On top of that what a great idea you had - instead of looking back at the year and seeing what you didn't do, you looked back and saw what you did. I may steal that idea!

And may I say what a list of accomplishments you have.

I feel honored you read my little blog!


Sarah Sullivan said...

LOL Barb..I must have gotten all the list writing genes..giggle!! I manage my life with lists..all the time!
I do a bit of review and goal setting the end of the year..but I start the process in October..must be the birthday thing. I tend to spirit, my business, my home life, my physical and emotional well being, our finances and my own personal needs and wants for the next year. Yup a really big list!
As for you wonderful list this year...may I say OMG WOWZA girl!! That is quite a list!! You did forget one small thing became a blogger..and one I love very much!! Whoot!!
Love ya Sis, Sarah

Alicia @ boylerpf said...

I have had a ball reading through your blog...I have missed it so! No resolutions or lists for me either. They have a tendency to make me feel guilty without any spontaneity allowed. We often criticize ourselves for things we haven't accomplished instead of looking at the things we have done.

To you and yours, Barb...a very blessed Christmas & a most splendid new year full of the dreams you do want to realize be they big or small!